Wow! What a crazy month it has been. My sister was diagnosed with malignant melanoma. She is only 23. She is expecting her first baby. I have spent countless hours researching cancer and the signs and risks. I have come across blog of people who have lost loved ones or are fighting for their life right now. I cried with them. I cried for my sister. I cried for me. I cried for my children. I cried for our parents. I cried for those dying. I cried for those having to live as widows. Needless to say, I cried a lot b/c my sister had cancer.

Then, last night we got an email from her saying that she did not have cancer. The lab had mixed up the samples. Someone else had cancer, not my sister. I had a flood of emotions at that point. I wrote this email to her this morning that describes it pretty well:

when I read this last night, I was livid. I was angry for all that you had to go through needlessly. Not knowing if you were going to be able to see your child grow to adulthood or possibly having to have some severe cancer treatment. Mad at the dr's office for screwing it up. Mad that you probably would have had another surgery and pretty heafty scarring needlessly, possibly a lymph node removed. I was mad that our whole family was worried so much about you and also about our sudden increase in cancer risk. I was mad that I had spent countless hours researching cancer and how to know when you should see a dr. Then I went to bed. Angry and a little relieved. Then I actually slept last night (which is rare with a baby). I dreamed. I was peaceful. I dreamed of being friends with people that I had previously disliked. I dreamed that I could see a different perspective. I dreamed that life was happy. That there is hope in life. I was happy. I woke up feeling peace. That suddenly turned to sorrow when I realized that b/c of your mole not being cancerous, that someone else's was. I was sorry for them. I cried for them. I hoped for them. I was saddened for their family and loved ones. I could do this b/c I have felt what it is like having a loved one with cancer. Not just any cancer, mind you, but the most deadly type of skin cancer. This experience has made me a better person. A little more aware of how fragile life can be. A little more aware that we are not invincible. A little more patient and loving. More open about my true feelings, not just the raging feelings of each moment. I'm sorry that you had a roller coaster of a month, but at least it is over and not just starting. Thank you for the lessons you have taught me.


I have always been the one to say that everything happens for a reason. There is a lesson to be learned in everything. Please, let us all live each day as if we will not see tomorrow. Let us love a little more. Let us show our love to others a little more often. Make someone happy today. Greet a stranger with a smile. Do a kind deed each day. Make this world a little happier. You never know if the person you meet at the grocery store is grieving the loss of a loved one or if the person who just rear-ended you on the street is on the way to the hospital to say good-bye for the last time to her husband (this really happened to someone I found on blogger).

Please also remember to do your cancer checks once a month. Get to know your body. Look for anything that is different. A sudden itchiness that won't go away. A new pain. A change in size or shape. An unexplained burning redness. Dimpling in the skin that is not the normal chunky dimples :-)  And for your moles: remember the ABCDE. Assymetry, borders, color, diameter, evolving. Basically if you know your body and suddenly it is different and there is no way to explain it (i.e. you were not injured running or bitten by an insect) then please go see your doctor. Cancer does not have to be a nasty word. Usually if you catch it early enough, your chances of survival are greatly increased or at least greatly prolonged. Don't ignore things just b/c you are afraid of hearing the word cancer. It is much easier to hear the words 'stage 1 cancer' than it is to hear the words 'stage 4 cancer'.

I am so thankful for all of you. I love all of you so much. Have a great day.